What thinking am I talking about

Happy Face Man Smiley

Man Happy Face Smiley

Learning to Think, Thinking to Learn…!!!

Do unto others what we would have others do unto us.

Just like every topic in this series, that I am going to share our experience about, Great Thinking also has a very broad spectrum. I will try to compress it in the scope of our very own, very personal experiences.

We keep hearing this phrase all the time “Happy Thoughts” and it makes a lot of sense as it signifies a trouble free, illuminated path in our lives.

Thinking happy thoughts

But how many of us actually get to travel on such a path. To be sure, we, personally, haven’t had any such luck. So, what does one do when faced with the not so carefree and not such a well illuminated path.

We face a lot of disturbing events every day that troubles our soul and causes us to stress and sometimes vent in anger and frustration. All the great gurus and mystics that we’ve had the privilege of listening to have a very simple solution for it all – don’t lose your calm, meditate on the greater good, we are superior beings in this God created world, we can all achieve greatness if and when we want to…and from one who’s been there, done that, take it from us, it doesn’t always work. On occasion, it might work for some time, but it surely doesn’t last and I am not going to all this trouble to enlighten you on what we achieved for a few years and then let go. I am here to tell you about what we achieved and made it stick.

We are just like you and everybody else who call themselves ‘common people’.

Thinking Angry thoughts

We face the same issues that everyone faces, people who wake up in the morning and get out of bed with a whole agenda of things that need to be done on a daily basis, like getting your kids up and running for their daily routine, or commuting the over-crowded bus/Metro to work and back, or facing road rage during rush hour traffic, or buying grocery, or shopping for clothes, the list is endless. So, what is it that am I talking about, that is so different. Actually it’s not.

The situation is the same for all of us. What can and may be different is how we react to it and this comes from a very fundamental aspect of our lives – upbringing.

Happy thinking with parents

Upbringing is what shapes our thoughts and thinking process. So, does it mean that someone who isn’t raised by parents or guardians, who are nice/loving/caring people, doesn’t have a chance?
Not so. Now, those of us who had the fortune of being raised by people who are nice, have the obvious advantage of inheriting these traits in our nature. But most of us are not that lucky. Not to say that most of us were raised by parents/guardian who don’t care/love us. On the contrary, most of us were raised with a lot of love and care. What indeed goes wrong is the idea of love and care that our begetters have towards us.
Let me elaborate, in my case, I was blessed with very loving and overtly protective parents. I have a Military father, who is so honest, that he put the well-being of his juniors on top of his own promotions in career and this is the aspect of his thinking that I admire the most in the man. Also, he was not only so protective toward his work peers; he was the same at home and to a fault.
Don’t let that make you feel that he was soft. On the contrary, he didn’t shy away from disciplining us by means of physical beating and thrashing around till our bones hurt.
And this is what my point here is; he loves us entirely and without a shred of doubt. Only problem was, his idea of expressing his love for us didn’t agree with our line of thinking. He provided us with all the material things that we needed to grow up and become successful members of today’s modern society. But he didn’t have a moment to spare in sitting and discussing things with us. He very vocally informed us that he was not our friend, that he was our parent, which he didn’t realize was causing such a huge divide between us, as human beings. In fact, he didn’t care to find out if we even wanted to be part of this so-called ‘Modern Society’.
The other thing that parents do wrong, in my personal opinion is, that they feel that their kids don’t realize what they themselves do in their private or public lives. On the contrary, we, as kids, pick up everything that our parents do, without even being formally educated on how one should behave in any given situation, right out of how we see our parents reacting in those very circumstances.
The last but not the least matter at hand is; being oblivious to what we, as kids, are trying to communicate to them and branding it as childish tantrums or ignorant banter.

This really affects us as kids, because we grow up thinking that the things we want to talk about are not important and there is no need for anybody to pay attention to them. The worst part is that we grow up thinking this is the right way to behave with everybody and specially our own kids.

So, we do unto others what was done unto us…!!!